The 7 Keys of Successful Management with Kyleigh Zengen
Three years ago, my now husband and I took a long drive up a windy road in the Catskills to Copake Lake, in Craryville, NY. We were newly engaged and the only place I could imagine us having our wedding was the Copake Country Club and The Greens at the Club. Together he and I had mapped out what we wanted on our wedding day. We knew we wanted an intimate experience with close friends, family and unforgettable food (I am a chef after all, and the food MUST be excellent). We knew we wanted to work with someone that understood and shared our vision. And most importantly, we wanted a custom tailored, one of a kind experience that celebrated the two of us coming together on one of the most important days of our lives. The only person I could envision being able to help us bring that to life was Kyleigh Zengen, the Director of Operations and Event Coordinator at Copake Country Club. Within a few minutes of introducing her to my husband and beginning the discussion of what would ultimately become our wedding day, we both knew it was a perfect fit for us.
Now I must confess I did not stumble upon Kyleigh or the Club by accident. We had both worked together previously at a restaurant in Millbrook, NY about 13 years ago. There as young women in our early 20s we went through our shares of growing pains; both quickly being promoted to management positions and oftentimes “faking it til we made it” along the way. It was being in those situations together throughout those early years that helped us both to form a long-lasting friendship and mutual respect for one another. As time went on our paths would change slightly. Hers would include having two children and mine would include a divorce. She would eventually become a director of operations & event manager in Columbia County and I would become a private chef in Westchester County. Even with those differences we would find ways to catch up whether on the phone or in person to keep each other inspired.
Recently as I’ve come to the 20-year mark of my career I have been asking what it is exactly that makes each of us “successful” by our own definitions as women in the food/restaurant industry? What are the characteristics that set us apart and kept us going? How are we able to create names for ourselves and stand out in rooms oftentimes and almost ALWAYS outnumbered by men? What have we learned in taking our own path to where we are now? And finally, what would we share with other women coming behind us if we could?
I strongly felt that Kyleigh was the perfect person to help contribute to this conversation. Together we mapped out the 7 Keys of Successful Management Philosophies that have led to her continued success in the restaurant industry and more specifically at Copake Country Club.
Key #1) Having Support at Work and Home
The first thing that came to light as we spoke was that nothing, she has accomplished would have been possible without the support from her husband Patrick as well as Jon & Kim Urban and Ross & Barb Mauri, owners of her current workplace. In fact, the first words spoken to Kyleigh when she interviewed for the position at the club were "family always comes first". This key factor is one of the many things that sets this establishment apart. That support from the owners, trickles down to management, which trickles down to the waitstaff and ultimately to the customers in the dining room. She also has a strong support system at home from her husband, which has enabled her to work long days when she needs to for an event or a long dinner service. Kyleigh mentioned that she does feel some guilt at not being able to oftentimes be in two places at once, but that the “family first” aspect has made the work she does each day possible. This philosophy allows her to take time off when she needs to, which in turn, allows to her come back to work motivated to find new ways to challenge herself and continue to build the events business at the club.
Key # 2) Be Clear About What You Want and ASK for it
When she first was asked to become a restaurant General Manager at 22 years old, Kyleigh’s husband Patrick asked her “what would it need to look like to make this job work for you?” Together they wrote down a list of what it would take to make this possible. She then used that list to advocate for herself and ask for what she wanted. (Side note here: THIS alone is something that has taken me 20 years to learn. I myself would always do the opposite by asking what restaurant owners wanted from ME and then get frustrated when the job wasn’t what I wanted at all!) Kyleigh put it quite simply by saying “How can you possibly get what you want from your job or IN LIFE if you never ask for it?”. Now that's something to think about!
Key #3) “Eat the Big Frog First”
Kyleigh first read about that this theory in 'The Success Principles' written by Jack Canfield. Put simply if you do the things you don’t want to do first, it will add to your momentum and sense of accomplishment at the end of the day. She says in order to make the best use of her time she will make a list, find the thing she wants to do least and tackle that first. For example, she says “if it’s been a busy night and the dining room needs to be reset and glasses need to be polished, reset the dining room first, then deal with the glasses.” She also models this for her son Hudson at home, teaching him that if he does the hard thing first, the fun things will be more rewarding later on. Through her guidance he's learning that once the “big frog” is out of the way it makes the other stuff he wants to do much more enjoyable.
Key #4) Advocate Equally for The Business, The Staff & The Customer
This key came up several times in our conversation and is something she is really passionate about. Kyleigh says that when making any important decisions she first considers how it can be best for the business, while also being fair to her staff and the customers. She also involves her staff in decisions she makes whenever possible. She says, It not only helps them to have some accountability in the decisions they make it also makes them feel like a part of the team.
Key #5) Know When to Delegate
This key is one I have personally struggled with, mainly because I'm a control freak. Those who know me and love me, know this. And not surprisingly as I'm sitting here writing this part of this post, I have written and rewritten this section three times. But as anyone in any type of leadership role knows, whether it be at work OR at home, it is absolutely necessary to learn how to effectively delegate. Not having this skill with lead you to failure and resentment each and every time. Kyleigh says through delegating she has freed herself up to continue to grow in her own leadership role at the club. She also has been able to further teach and empower her staff in the process.
Key #6) Be Honest
Whether it be with the customer, owners or the staff, being honest is something Kyleigh said she learned a long time ago. She says that even though it may seem easier for example to "blame the kitchen for a server mistake", (which I can attest happens quite often) if you admit where you went wrong oftentimes the customer will understand and appreciate your honesty. The same is true when addressing management or staff. Honesty is truly the best policy.
Key #7 ) Surround Yourself with Good People
Lastly, she mentioned how important it is to surround yourself with good people. This goes from friends and family to upper management and staff. If you don’t have friends and family around you to keep you accountable to your goals, you will lose sight of them. If you don’t have a great team working with you that is excited to execute them, the result never be what you envisioned. And finally, if you don’t have a certain amount of freedom and support from your superiors to reach those goals, they simply will never happen.
In having this conversation with Kyleigh, I learned so much about what success looks like and means to her. Since starting at Copake Country Club in 2013, she has expanded the events business to include more weddings (from 3 when she started to 12 in her busiest season), a winter trivia night which has become its own phenomenon, and in the process has helped build the clubs reputation as a community event hub! Last year she also held the first ever Food Truck Fest, which drew upwards of 600 people between locals and tourists. She's helped enhance the functionality and ambiance of the space as well as build a fabulous team, the list goes on and on. While she mentioned that none of this is exactly easy, she feels so grateful to work in a setting that supports her in so many ways. "I truly could not see myself working any place else, she says, I feel really lucky to be able to work for such great people, in such a unique setting."